Desperately Searching for Creative Domesticity

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Book Review: The River Runs Dry by Sibella Giorello

I wanted to love it...

In all fairness I think I must first say that I usually don't read Christian inspired or based books. Not because I dislike them, but the occasion just has never presented itself.

The back cover synopsis of the story had me wanting to read more. It was intriguing and caught my attention.

I am all for a strong woman main character and Raleigh Harmon seemed a perfect fit. She is an FBI forensic special agent and searching for a missing girl. She battles life in a new city, her mother, and bureau politics. I wanted to cheer her on.

But what I found myself doing was putting Sibella Giorello's book down over and over again. Her writing was too "wordy" for me. At points it would seem like a whole page was devoted to the details of her bureau car, the weather, or even the look of a person who wasn't even a main character in the story.

I struggled to finish "The River Runs Dry". It was sedate, melancholy and almost, dare I say boring. I kept waiting for the action to come or the intensity to speed up and it just never happened.

However, because this book has no foul language or graphic details, I can easily see a teenager reading it without harm.

Would I recommend it? No. It just lulls the reader into a place where no avid reader wants to go. And that's to sleep.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

I'm Back...

Boy have I missed this place.

Friday, February 13, 2009

Happy Valentines Day to the Best Man I Know...

My Dearest Dennis,

Over the last few years I have tried a million times to tell you how I feel about you but I have never had the strength nor the courage. It seems silly I know. After all we have been together since we were 17 years old. We married at 20 and had our baby girl at 21, and our miracle baby boy at 33. Here we are about to turn 39 and we have been together for nearly half of our lives. And I can't talk to you...

It's not what you think, sweet man.
I am not going to tell you anything bad.
The kids are OK, I am OK. Everything is fine.

I know the last 5 years have been difficult.
This battle I am fighting with my health seems to be unending.
I know you will not agree.
You would never say I have made life hard for us.
You are far too kind and selfless.
That's why it has been hard for me to tell you how grateful I am to you.

Although we have never lived a life of luxuries or frivolities, I AM happy.
I do not need fancy clothes, cars, or homes to know I am loved.
I have you.

Although we have struggled at times to pay the bills, buy food, and keep a roof over our heads, I never wanted for anything.
I KNOW I am safe and will never go hungry.
I have you.

Although my health has steadily declined since Cameron was born 5 years ago, my life has had meaning and purpose.
I have a GREAT life.
Because I have you.

You and I have had a thousand conversations about why we always seem to have to fight harder than some couples do for the simple things in life. But I have come to realize that even though we have never lived an easy life, we have lived a life filled with true, honest, giving love. We have watched marriages fail all around us. The truth is the bones of our love story do not rest in the material things. They reside in the fact that we always knew the most valuable thing we have is each other.

As I have struggled to keep up my end of our relationship as my health has gotten and continues to get worse, you have not only become the sole income for our family but on many days, the dishwasher, cook, and housekeeper. I have cried myself to sleep many nights at the guilt of putting all of this additional weight upon your shoulders. I have fought self-hatred.

And yet every time I try to tell you, you shrug me off. Tell me not to worry or that I am being silly. But I know how hard it is on you. And yet you have never wavered. You have never let me feel bad. You have only picked up my heart and made me fight a little longer.

I do not know what I would ever do without you.
You give me strength.
You love me until my heart hurts.
You work harder than any man I know.
You make the kids and I your only priority.
You are honest, caring, and devoted.

I love you.
Deeply and from the core of my soul.
You have made me a better person.
You have given me the two greatest gifts of my life, our babies.
I will proudly grow as old as I can with you.
But when the day comes for us to part ways on this Earth I want you to know two things.

I have had a WONDERFUL life and I have NO regrets.
And I will be waiting for you in Heaven.

All of my love always,
Tam

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

I choose love.

These are MY girls.
One by birth, one by choice.

We love them equally.
Ash is our birth daughter.
Anastasia, we call her Ana or mumma, is Ash's best friend.

Friday, January 9, 2009

100 Things

Since I deleted my archives (They are all safely printed and tucked away in a safe place for my kids someday.) I thought I might "borrow" this post idea from KB.

100 Random Bits of Shit and Shinola about Moi:

1. I am married to my high school sweetheart.
2. I never paint my fingernails.
3. I ALWAYS paint my toenails. LOL :)
4. I don't like kitties. Well I like kitties I just wouldn't have one.
5. I love to go barefoot.
6. I am a country girl through and through.
7. I don't eat chocolate. (IE, I prefer chocolate chip cookies without the chocolate chips, LOL)
8. I dream of cooking Chinese food really well.
9. I cuss A LOT.
10. I have naturally curly hair that is a curse AND a blessing.
11. I am afraid of dying.
12. I miss my Dad so much my heart hurts. E.V.E.R.Y.D.A.Y
13. I live in a small town. Population 2075
14. When I was teenager I dreamed of getting the HELL out of this town.
15. When I got pregnant at 20 all I wanted to do was move back.
16. I am a speed reader. I can read a 400 page book in a few hours.
17. I can NOT chew gum. I WILL swallow it. Guaranteed.
18. I worry about being a good Momma. All the time. Every second. Every day.
19. I sing to my kids every day and make up silly songs with their names in them.
20. I can spot a liar a mile away.
21. I hate people who feel the need to lie.
22. I taught myself to crochet in a week.
23. I can NOT knit to save my life. I have tried. Repeatedly.
24. I give nicknames to everyone I ♥. Even our dogs.
25. I wish I had more friends. :(
26. I have really bad nightmares sometimes.
27. I think I am funny.
28. I love funny people.
29. I am shy. Until you get to know me.
30. I have really bad self-esteem. I don't like my looks. (*ugh! TMI!)
31. I still get goosebumps when my husband comes home from work. Every day ;)
32. I pray a lot.
33. I also sin a lot.
34. I worry about the 2 above issues.
35. I would love to have a layout published in a scrapbook magazine.
36. I never submit to scrapbook magazines or design teams. HELLO, ya hypocrite!
37. Mountain Dew is my liquid love.
38. Diet pop/food/sugar substitutes make my mouth taste like I have been eating tin foil. It's a chemical reaction, verified by my Doctor.
39. I have Fibromyalgia. And I hate it.
40. I would die for my kids. No questions asked.
41. I have 2 sisters and 3 brothers.
42. I am very close to my sisters. Not my brothers.
43. I am the youngest child. My closest sibling is 10 years older than I am. My oldest will be 57 this year and I will be 39.
42. I love to cook.
43. I hate to do dishes.
44. I make amazing comfort food.
45. My parents are from the deep south so I consider myself part hillbilly. I know all about grits, gravy, cornbread, greens, etc.
46. I am currently writing a cookbook for family and friends.
47. I don't go to Starbucks. I drink Maxwell House.
48. Target is my Anthropolgie. LOL :)
49. I care more about playing with my kids than cleaning my house.
50. Laundry and I are NOT friends.
51. I envy all of you who can buy scrapbook supplies at will.
52. I cry at commercials. LDS and Coca-Cola Christmas commercials get me every single time.
53. I am addicted to blog-surfing and twitter.
54. Ladybugs creep me out.
55. I LOVE to swim and have a pool.
56. I wish I could sew.
57. I love spaghetti and pasta, OK Italian food in general.
58. I am getting grey hair. It's is both disturbing and interesting to me.
59. I love snow and rain.
60. I would like to write a children's book and have my husband illustrate it.
61. I make bracelets and necklaces from up-cycled and vintage belts.
62. I don't like people who look down at other people.
63. My husband and I chose to live with less money so I could stay at home to raise our kids.
64. My husband makes me feel safe and keeps me in check.
65. I can be a bitch when provoked.
66. All my daughters friends want to hang out at our house because they say I am a "cool Mom". That makes me feel...cool :)
67. One of my daughters best friends currently lives with us 5 days a week. We don't get any money from her family. And I could care less. I do it so she can have a stable, safe, loving home. I call her my daughter. She calls me Mom. (more on this later.)
68. I gave my nieces, daughters, and her friends handmade journals and am teaching them a scrapbook class called, "52 weeks of 2009 - My Life in Photos" for Christmas.
69. I really don't have any girlfriends I hang out with in real life.
70. That makes me incredibly sad at times.
71. I went to school with a murderer. True Story.
72. I always try to learn something new. But master very little. But I keep trying.
73. Seafood makes me violently ill.
74. I LOVE a great steak.
75. I sleep with a fan on 365 days a year. Even though we have central air even.
76. I can ice skate like a pro.
77. I love to go camping and sit around a fire with friends and family.
78. I don't own a car. We have one that my husband uses to go to work.
79. I am an organizational freak.
80. I have bad time management skills.
81. But I work great under a deadline.
82. I help care for my Mom who had brain surgery and can no longer care for herself.
83. I miss my "old" Mom immensely. She has never recovered.
84. I refuse to gossip. I think it's petty and pathetic.
85. I am a republican but I voted for Barack Obama.
86. I look beyond skin, weight, looks and love from the inside out.
87. I never stay mad. Life is too short.
88. I love people who are full of life, spirited, and out-going. They make me want to be a better person.
89. I don't own a fancy camera. Just a basic point and shoot.
90. I like lists.
91. I am drawn to people who have a strong character, are ballsy, who speak what they feel, but don't judge.
92. I know I don't fit into this "online" scrapbooking world. I am a square peg in a round hole.
93. I wonder a lot about my purpose in this world.
94. I am a loyal and devoted friend.
95. Somerset Studios are my FAVORITE magazines. My husband also happens to print them.
96. I LOVE sunflowers and prefer them to ANY flower.
97. My kids are almost 12 years apart in age. I couldn't get pregnant after miscarriages and we just thought God had given us one blessing. 5 years ago we got a BIG surprise. LOL :)
98. My husband and I will have been married for 18 years on June 8th, 2009.
99. I am always up late, late at night.
100. My family is everything.

Wow, that took forever but I could have kept going. LOL :)
I think I will do that every year.
Something cool to leave for my kids.

Sheep dip, I need to go to bed.
♥